Delusional First Years: Mission HHr
by InMyJazzShoes
Summary: Two nosy first years decide to go on the ultimate mission: Make Harrry Potter and Hermione Granger fall in love. But will the obstacles in the way be too much to handle?
1. The Hero, the Bookworm, and the Prat

**Author's Note:** This random idea popped into my head, and I kind of wanted to tear away from the dramatic stuff that I usually write. This story is told in first person by Jenny McLaggen, Cormac McLaggen's younger sister that I just made up (Cormac was in the Slug Club). She's a first year, and so is her best friend Faith. Together, they're on a mission to get Harry and Hermione together (this is during Harry's sixth year). The main thing that I changed about the plot of HBP is that Ron and Lavender are together before the Christmas party. I haven't read HBP since I reread it six months ago, so please bear with any mistakes about the plot I might have made. This may seem like just a stupid story about two nosy first years, and sure, I guess it kind of is, but I'm enjoying writing it, and it's something that _I_ would definately read. There are more chapters coming up, and I have a pretty good idea about what's going to happen in the next chapter. This won't be a long fic, either. Geez, I write really long Author's Notes, don't I? Well, without any further a due, here's the story :)

* * *

Delusional First Years: Mission HHr

Objective 1.0: The Hero, the Bookworm, and the Prat

I sat in the Gryffindor common room, practicing the levitating spell. _"Wingardium leviosa!"_ I whispered as I pointed to my Potions book. It only shook a bit. Professor Flitwick had made it look so easy..._Come on_, I thought to myself. _It's only a book...it's only a book... _After a few more attempts, the book still would not lift off the ground. Suddenly, the portrait hole opened, and two sixth years walked into the room. After a closer look, I recognized them to be Harry Potter and Hermione Granger. They silently walked over to the couch in the center of the room and sat down beside each other. I was about to continue practicing the levitation spell, but the older witch and wizard were so quiet that I just _knew_ something was going to happen. And I, Jenny McLaggen, being the main source of gossip of the Gryffindor first years, was not going to pass up such a chance to see a private conversation between Harry and Hermione. After all, I witnessed them hugging by the lake just a week ago. Who knew what would happen?

"Ron's such a prat!" Hermione exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air.

"Just give him time. He'll come to his senses," Harry replied softly, staring into the flames of the lit fireplace.

_Ron?_ Oh yeah, that Weasley kid...I had seen him snogging Lavender Brown all over the castle. Hermione's attitude sparked many questions for me, though. Hermione was calling Ron a prat, and Ron was going out with Lavender. The only explanation was that Hermione liked Ron. Wait..._what_? I was eager to rush upstairs and tell Faith Sparke that all of our conclusions of the romantic relationship between Harry and Hermione might as well have been thrown out of the garbage. After all our predictions and estimates...we were wrong the whole time. And I thought that Faith, who was muggleborn and had true mathematics education in muggle schools, wouldn't mess up such a guaranteed calculation.

"I mean, he just thinks that it's perfectly okay to snog Lavender Brown in every closet that comes into sight!" Hermione continued. Her bushy hair was bushier than usual, and tears began falling down her pale cheeks.

Harry seemed to not want to say anything. I wanted to punch him in the face and say, "Help the girl, already!" Still, he did nothing. Being a girl myself, I could tell from Hermione's tone of voice that she wanted Harry to say something as she continued ranting. Finally, she stood up, gave Harry a glare, and rush up to the girl's dormitories. Needless to say, my happy mood was now completely ruined. I decided to practice the levitation spell. _"Wingardium leviosa!"_ I whispered. The book levitated slightly in a straight line. I silently wondered if I could levitate and object and throw it across a room, like levitating the pillows into the box during Charms. Harry was still sitting on the couch, staring into the fireplace in silence. Apparently, he had not heard me practicing the spell. I concentrated on the book, then the side of his head, and I whispered, "_Wingardium leviosa!"_ The Potions book flew off the ground, zoomed across the room, and slammed against the side of Harry's head. He glanced over at the source of where the book had been thrown, but only spotted shadows.

_That's_ what you get for not even bothering to help a heartbroken teenage girl.

--------------------

"Faith!" I exclaimed the next morning, trying to wake up my best friend. "Faith, get up!"

"Wha --?" was the reply. She rubbed her navy blue eyes and stretched her thin arms out, almost whacking me across the face. "What do you want?"

I rolled my eyes and shook her left shoulder. "Bookworm likes Ron Weasley." Bookworm was our codename for Hermione. Hey, you never know when codenames might come in handy. My mind was spinning at the speed of light to come up with a nickname for Ron...Prat would do for now, since Bookworm called him that.

"Ron Weasley?" Faith asked in disbelief. "That doesn't make any sense...she...she always liked...the Hero!" Yup, the Hero was Harry's codename.

I flipped by black hair behind my shoulder and looked at the window, where the morning sunlight was pouring in. I turned back to face Faith and asked, "What do you think we should do?" My best friend shook her head in defeat. But surely, there had to be something we could do. "Wait!" I exclaimed. I could literally see the lightbulb over my own head. "Cormac was invited to Professor Slughorn's Christmas party...Harry and Hermione are going there, too!"

"Yeah, but I thought that they didn't allow first years to go to the party," Faith said, rubbing her eyes again. "And your brother won't help us."

I waved away her comment. Pssh. We didn't need invitations. "Seth can lend us his Invisibility Cloak," I told her in pride. Seth, our other best friend, had gotten an Invisibility Cloak from his grandma or something like that...And Invisibility Cloaks are _so_ rare. I heard Georgia Rent say that Harry Potter has one, but I only trust gossip that's coming from _me_.

"But Seth won't trust us with his Cloak! Remember what happened the last time we borrowed it?"

Oh yeah. I certainly remembered _that_.

"Well, he'll trust us this time," I reassured her.

Faith rolled her eyes and said, "How can you be so sure?" I didn't respond. Instead, I was scheming ways to sneak into the boy's dormitory and _borrow_ Seth's Invisiblity Cloak.

"I have a plan," I finally said.

--------------------

Faith and I woke up at around midnight, when everyone else was asleep. We got dressed in black robes just to add to the sneaky effect. According to Faith, most muggles who were trying to steal something tended to wear black. I tucked my wand under my robes and tied my long, black hair back. I checked the watch that my dad had given me for my eleventh birthday, and I whispered to Faith, "Ready?" She nodded, and we both picked up Exploding Snaps (courtesy of Cormac) and made our way to the door of the boy's dormitory. We sat down and opened the game. Since the door was locked, and Faith and I hadn't even gotten close to mastering "_Alohomora_", we had to cause some sort of disruption so that the boys would wake up and walk outside. During the process, they would open the door of course, and we would slip inside.

If, of course, everything went as planned. Within a minute, one of the Snaps exploded. Dust flew everywhere, and we already heard the boys cursing and rushing to the door. Faith and I hid within the shadows as the door opened. I grabbed Faith's arm and pulled her through the dust. "Ouch!" I exclaimed as someone bumped into me.

"Who was that?" someone asked. I ran faster, and we eventually made it into the boy's dormitory. Everyone had been walking outside, and the dust was starting to fade away. We had to act fast. I spotted a nightstand with the Cloak on it. Well, that was easy.

"Faith! This way!" I whispered to her. We snuck over to the nightstand (no doubt that it was Seth's) and I snatched it and placed the Cloak over us. Within ten seconds, the boys returned to the dormitory. Seth was amongst them, rubbing his eyes and cursing under his breath. We watched him lay down on his bed, and he didn't seem to notice that his Cloak was gone.

Yeah, let's keep it that way.

--------------------

Faith and I were working on our Potions essays when Harry and Hermione walked into the common room. Hermione looked a little happier, while Harry appeared to be tired.

"Wait, so...Ron asked you to go the Christmas party?" Harry asked. Faith and I exchanged shocked looks. Thank goodness we were hidden in the shadows.

Hermione smiled and replied, "Yes."

"Why?"

_"Harry James Potter!"_ Hermione exclaimed. "You're wondering why a boy has asked me to go to a party with him?"

"It's _Ron_," Harry reminded her calmly. "He's been snogging Lavender everywhere, even in the --"

"Yes, I'm aware of that, Harry," Hermione snapped back, folding her arms over her chest. I tried to concentrate on my Potions essay because first of all, I shouldn't have been so nosy to be so obsessed with these sixth years' lifes, and second of all, it was pretty upsetting to see the two friends argue.

"I just want to make sure that you don't get hurt again," Harry said. _Awww._ I could tell that Faith was thinking the same thing from the look on her face. Anyone with a brain could tell that the two were meant to be together. All they needed was a little push, like learning to ride those bicycles that Faith had told me about. The Prat was ruining everything.

Hermione sighed and said, "I'll be fine, Harry."

"He's going back to Lavender after the party, you know that, right?" Harry said. I couldn't help but agree with him.

"I can't believe I'm hearing this!" Hermione said, throwing her arms into the air. "I thought that you'd support me through this, but apparently, you're not."

Harry ran his fingers through his hair and said, "I wouldn't be a good friend if I was lying to you."

Hermione stood up and stormed off, probably to the library or where ever bookworms normally went. Harry buried his face in his hands and whispered,"She deserves better than that." He looked so helpless, trying to help his friend, but all he was really doing was pushing her away. Faith glanced at me, wondering what we should do. I was thinking about confronting him, but it was crucial that we had to keep ourselves under cover. I tried to continue completing my Potions essay, but I couldn't remember yesterday's lesson. So, I threw the essay beside me and took out my wand.

I spotted a feather on the floor and whispered, _"Wingardium leviosa!"_ The feather shook a bit, but it didn't levitate. I tried a few more times, and the same thing happened. This really confused me, since I had been able to levitate a book and slam it against Harry's head, but I couldn't even lift a feather. _"Wingardium leviosa!"_ I said in a louder voice. The feather started levitating, and Faith watched in amazement.

"Who's there?" Harry's deep voice echoed through the common room. The feather dropped to the ground. "Who's there?" he repeated.

Faith looked at me with a worried look. She certainly wasn't going to say anything. I stood up and emerged from the shadows. "I'm just practicing the levitating spell," I told him. "Sorry if I disturbed you."

"No, you didn't disturb me," he said.

"Er...alright..." I replied softly. There was an awkward silence as Harry looked back into the fireplace. I picked up my Potions essay and walked back up the girl's dormitory. There was no use to stay there when Harry had detected our existence. I heard Faith gather her books and follow me up the stairs.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Not the most exciting ending, but I figured that I'd leave off from there. If you have the time, please write a review. It's nice inspiration for me to continue :) 


	2. Christmas Party Preparations

**Author's Note:** Happy New Year, everyone! I hope you're all having a fantastic holiday. Well anyways, I was really excited about this chapter because not only is it at a decent length, but I think that this story is turning out just the way I had planned it. This doesn't completely follow the HBP plot, so please bear with me. This isn't the same writing style as "Nineteen Years" and "Saying Goodbye", but I'm willing to take on the challenge. And if you're wondering what the "Oh. My God.", "Just fantastic.", etc. text is doing in here, please remember that this is written in first person pov from an eleven year old :)

**Disclaimer:** J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. Not me. Duh.

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Delusional First Years: Mission HHr

Objective 2.0: Christmas Party Preparations

"Jenny! Wake up! JENNY!" Faith's rushed voice rattled my eardrums on a chilly November morning. I rolled over to my side, facing away from her, and wrapped my blanket tighter around my tiny figure. "Honestly, Jenny, this is _important_!"

I looked at the small clock on my nightstand and rubbed my eyes. "It's four o'clock in the morning," I said, still half asleep.

"But...but...Harry and Hermione are in the common room!" she whispered quickly, making sure that to not wake up the other girls in the room. Suddenly, I didn't feel so tired after all. Faith stepped aside and I got dressed into my school robes. It was a Thursday, so I had to get into my robes eventually for the school day. "Get your Transfiguration book."

"Why?"

Faith rolled her blue eyes and said, "We need an excuse to be downstairs, obviously." She was always the smart one.

"Right." I walked over to my trunk and took the heavy textbook from the top of it. As we silently walked out of the girl's dormitory, I raised an eyebrow and asked, "How did you know that they were in the common room?"

"I was heading downstairs to study, and I saw them."

"You were studying this early?" I asked in bewilderment.

My best friend shrugged, and our feet finally touched the solid floor of the common room. The warmth from the fireplace wrapped around my previously chilled body. Harry and Hermione's shadows had morphed into one, which was casted upon Faith and I. We casually walked over to our usual seats. Unfortunately, the fireplace wasn't as bright as usual, so we weren't hidden by shadows.

Just fantastic.

Harry and Hermione turned their heads simultaneously in response to the disturbance in the room. They probably wouldn't normally be bothered by two first years in the common room, but it was four o'clock in the morning, and Hermione asked, "Um...can we help you?"

I casually supressed a cough and sat down in my favorite chair. "We're just going to study for our Transfiguration test. It's scheduled for today," I lied. Hermione seemed satisfied with the reply, and she looked back into the fireplace. Harry, however, kept his eyes on me for a second longer, remembering me from about a month ago.

It was quite difficult to pretend to be studying, as I never bothered with such a thing. Faith, meanwhile, actually looked like she was studying. I rolled my eyes and faced the small text in my book. My ears, however, were wide open to any conversation between the two teenagers sitting on the couch that was facing the dimly lit fireplace.

"I'm going to the Christmas party with Luna," Harry admitted quietly to Hermione. My jaw dropped. Loony? _Loony Lovegood_? What the bloody hell was wrong with these sixth years?

Hermione seemed just as surprised as I was. "W-With who?"

"Luna," he said impatiently.

"But...why? I mean, I know that she's nice and all, and she did help us at the Department of Mysteries last year --"

"Well, there was really nobody else. And we're just going as friends."

"I'm not going with anyone yet," Hermione said, crossing her right leg over her left. Faith's eyes grew wide and she faced me. I looked away, though, and continued paying attention to the conversation. "_You_ could've asked me."

Much to my disapointment, Harry didn't look as though this was a golden opportunity. "You probably want to go with Ron, though," he said.

"No, actually."

"Don't lie to me Hermione. You've liked Ron for a long time," Harry said. I had an urge to write down "_Doesn't beat around the bush much_" in our mission notebook.

Hermione gasped and folded her arms over her chest. "I...I can't believe you just said that, Harry!" She looked as though she was going to storm upstairs to the girl's dormitory, but she remained where she was.

"But it's true. You should just get it over with and ask Ron to go to the Christmas party with you before Lavender does," Harry said. He looked a little disapointed, as though he regretted his words. I glanced over at Faith to see her reaction, which was the same as mine.

The bookworm didn't seem too pleased with Harry's comment, but she sighed in defeat and said, "He wouldn't want to go with me anyways."

"Don't say that --"

"No. I'm telling the truth. I'm the ugliest girl in Hogwarts," Hermione muttered quietly. I could spot a tear forming at the edge of one of her brown eyes.

Harry glanced at her and said, "You're not the ugliest girl in Hogwarts, Hermione." He swallowed, looked around the room, and then back at her. "I think that you're one of the prettiest."

Oh. My. God.

Hermione's cheeks got very red, and a broad smile spread across her face. "Do you...do you really mean it?" she asked.

"Of course I do," Harry replied.

"Thank you, Harry. That...that means a lot to me," Hermione said with her cheeks getting redder by the second. The two teenagers turned their heads to spot Faith and I with our jaws open wide and hope gleaming in our eyes.

"Er..." Harry muttered uncomfortably. He turned back to Hermione, who was still red, and said, "Anyways, I think that you should ask Ron to go to the Christmas party with you."

This time he said it, Hermione looked a little disapointed. "Oh, um, right. Maybe tonight...I suppose..." her voice trailed off as she glanced into the dim flames in the grand fireplace. Neither of them said anything for a few minutes.

"Right, then," Harry said, breaking the rather awkward silence. "I'm going to get some more sleep before breakfast."

"Me too," Hermione replied, standing up quickly and rushing back up to the girl's dormitory. Harry sighed and trudged up the stairs after glancing at us once more.

----------------------

"So, let me get this straight...you want Harry Potter and Hermione Granger to..._fall in love_?" Seth asked in disbelief. Faith and I nodded simultaneously. He turned his head to look out of a window within the Great Hall, causing his messy brown hair to cover his eyes for a moment or two. "I always knew that you two were nosy, but this is really extreme."

Faith said, "They belong together, though. Just look at them!" Seth and I glanced at the other end of the Gryffindor table; Hermione was reading a book while Harry was taking a sip from a glass of pumpkin juice.

"Yeah, I _really_ see the love," Seth commented, rolling his eyes and turning back to face us. I somehow felt the urge to smack his arm. "By the way, have you seen my Cloak? Mum would kill me if I lost it..."

I shrugged and said, "It's kind of difficult to find something lost when it's invisible." He shot me a look and I added, "It'll turn up eventually."

"Bookworm is asking the Prat to the party tonight, Jenny. We've got to do something," Faith interupted.

"Who's Bookworm and Prat?" Seth asked curiously.

I folded my arms across my chest and said, "None of your business."

"Oh, come on, Jenny. Don't be like this."

"You don't want to help us out, so I suppose that you'll just have to figure these things out yourself," I replied with a slight sense of pride in my voice. Okay, so it was a _huge_ sense of pride...

Seth rolled his eyes again and muttered, "Sometimes, I can't believe why I'm even friends with you."

Usually, most people would have been offended by such a comment. But no, not Jenny McLaggen. "We've been friends since we were in diapers, so you're stuck with me." I could picture Faith's blue eyes rolling along with Seth's.

"Fine, I'll go along with you guys..." he muttered.

Faith and I squealed with excitement.

"But on one condition," Seth said. "I want my Cloak back."

I sighed and looked back at the human lie detector. "But we'll need to use it."

"For what?" Faith asked.

And so I told them my plan.

--------------------

"Ouch! You stepped on my foot!" Faith whispered.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

Seth put his finger to his lips. It was a pity that the Invisibility Cloak didn't cut off sound, because things would have been going a whole lot smoother. "We've got to keep ourselves quiet. Now, where's Ron supposed to be?"

"They're coming out of Potions in a moment..." I said plainly.

Faith impatiently tapped her foot on the marble flooring. "Professor Flitwick won't be happy when he finds out that we've skipped Charms," she commented. Her eyes took an interest in one of the moving paintings to the right of the Potions class doors.

"We'll survive."

"Shhh!" Seth whispered hastily as the doors opened. Sixth year Gryffindors and Slytherins poured out of the classroom, and Harry, Ron, and Hermione were the last three to leave.

"Are you sure that it'll work?" Faith asked me.

"I'm positive," I assured her. "Cormac says it'll keep him suspended in the air for an hour. And since he'll end up in a rarely visited corridor, nobody will be able to help him out."

Seth smacked my arm to notify me that I was talking too loudly. Harry glanced over to where we were standing. I had to admit that it was rather creepy to have someone staring right at you, but they couldn't actually see you. The bright intensity of his green eyes didn't really help, either.

"Who's there?" Harry asked cautiously, pointing his wand in our direction. I heard Faith's sharp breath.

"Harry, nobody's there..." Hermione said, glancing to where our Cloaked bodies were. "Are you hearing things again? Maybe you should talk to Professor Dumbledore, he'll know what to do. Or maybe Voldemort's --"

"_Don't say his name!_" Ron said through his gritted teeth.

"-- trying to tell you something," she ended in a low whisper, ignoring Ron. "Does your scar hurt?" Faith gave me a confused look, and I returned it.

"No, and I wouldn't be jumping to conclusions," Harry said quietly, lowering his wand, but still gripping it tightly. "Anyways, we should be heading to the common room." Hermione shot a hopeful look at Harry, then Ron.

"Actually," Ron said, placing his hands in the pockets of his school robes. "Lavender sent me a note that she wanted to see me in the library. I'll see you two later, though." The hope in Hermione's eyes faded away at his words and she looked over at Harry helplessly.

"Er...right, then," Harry replied. "Come on, Hermione." The bookworm reluctantly followed him, obviously disapointed about the sudden change of plans.

Once the three teenagers were out of our sight, Faith whispered, "He fell for it! I never thought that we would be able to copy Lavender's handwriting...those loops were hard to pull off --"

"We should make sure that the trap works," I interupted, motioning Seth and Faith to follow me. "You never know if Cormac could be lying to us." The others nodded, and we made our way to the location where Lavender would supposedly be meeting him. It was a quiet, deserted place, and Ron most likely went along with the note because he probably thought it was for another snogging session.

"Almost there..." Seth whispered. All three of us stared at the statue of a knight in the middle of the hallway. Ron was so close to passing it, he was missing the invisible string by inches...

"Won Won!" we heard an annoying, high-pitched voice. I turned around and saw Lavender Brown standing at the mouth of the corridor. "What are you doing here, silly?"

"You wrote me a note, didn't you?" Ron asked, clearly confused.

"No..."

Ron shrugged. "Oh well. You still met me here."

"I was just looking for you...you see, I had a question to ask," Lavender said suggestively. She slowly approached him, and I was waiting for Ron to back up to hit the string...

"What question?"

"Well..." Lavender began. "Slughorn's Christmas party is just around the corner, and I was wondering...er...if you wanted to come with me." She batted her eyelashes and flipped her hair behind her shoulders.

Ron glanced at her, then at the statue of the knight, then back at her. "Sure," he replied. "Actually, I was planning on asking you today, too."

Lavender squealed, wrapped her thin arms around his body, and gave him a kiss. "What about that Hermione girl?" she asked as she pulled herself a few inches away from him.

"What about her?" Ron seemed to be in a trance.

"Well, she seems to really like you, and...well...I was wondering how we could possibly be in this relationship without getting murdered by her."

Ron snapped out of his trance. "Hermione wouldn't _murder_ us, Lavender."

She waved away his reply. "She's not really going down without a fight. I sleep in the same dormitory as her...she could just sneak up on me when I'm fast asleep and --"

"No," Ron said defensively. "She won't murder us."

Lavender seemed taken aback by his response. "Do you...do you _like her_, Won Won?"

"No, I don't. She's just a friend," he said. I was almost expecting his ears to go pink, or his face to turn red, but nothing happened...his face remained still and honest...

So, Ron really _didn't_ like Hermione. There was no use for the invisible string anymore. I sighed heavily as we started walking back to the common room. I would have loved to see Ron Weasley being suspended in the air upside down in a full body bind.

"This makes things a little easier," Faith whispered in my ear.

The common room never seemed so tense. Harry was sitting in a chair beside my favorite one, doing nothing else but casting worried glances at Hermione, who was sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace anxiously. The Ron-Lavender encounter must have lasted longer than we thought, because everyone was already out of the room. Without even thinking about it, I removed the Invisibility Cloak from us. Harry had apparently been looking our way, because he jumped a bit from his seat.

"Jenny, you idiot!" Seth screamed at me as he took the bundled Cloak from my arms. "My dad doesn't want anyone know about --"

"You have an Invisibility Cloak?" Harry asked with great interest.

"Er...yeah...it was my grandma's..." Seth muttered through his clenched teeth. Then he turned to me and said in a hushed tone, "I can't believe you just did that! An Invisibility Cloak isn't something you want too many other people to know about!"

"Calm down," I said matter-of-factly. I could feel Harry's _and_ Hermione's eyes on me now. "They won't remember three first years sneaking around the castle in a Cloak."

Harry and Hermione bursted out laughing. Faith, Seth, and I exchanged confused looks. They were still laughing as we headed back to our dormitories. I surely _hoped_ that they wouldn't remember about the Cloak, at least. But apparently, this didn't really matter, because Seth banned our rights to ever touch the Cloak again. Usually, this wouldn't have bothered Faith and I because we could just sneak into the boy's dormitories again, but he threatened to have Professor McGonagall perform a spell on it that any time me or Faith touched the Cloak, Stinksap would spray all over the place.

"When do you think Ron will be back?" Faith asked me as we returned to the girl's dormitories.

"Why does it matter?"

"Because we'll want to know what happens, obviously," she said, flipping her long hair behind her and extracting a book from her neatly organized trunk. "Maybe Hermione might just realize that she deserves Harry, not Ron. Ron's a prat."

"That's why his codename is Prat," I commented. "And anyways, I know exactly what's going to happen." I laid down on my four poster bed and took out my wand. "_Wingardium leviosa!_" I said, trying to lift Faith's book from her hands.

"Hey, what the -- ?" Faith clutched her book tightly, and even so, it didn't make an attempt to lift itself from her grasp.

"_Wingardium leviosa!_" The book would still not levitate. "Hermione's going to ask Ron to go to the Christmas party with her, and he's going to say that he's already going with Lavender. He'll walk away, Hermione will cry, and Harry will be left alone to comfort her. That's when he'll decide to ask her to the Christmas party, saying that Luna would have to find someone else to go to the party with. _Wingardium leviosa!_"

Faith continued holding onto her book and said, "How do you know that's what's exactly going to happen?"

"It just makes sense," I said. "_Wingardium lev _--"

"Stop it!" she interupted. "We should at least confirm your prediction."

"Fine," I muttered, standing up from my bed. "If you must dare to question my judgements." Faith playfully rolled her eyes and we snuck downstairs. Harry and Hermione were still there, only there were three fourth year boys huddled in a tight circle, whispering to one another.

"The Skiving Snackboxes, yes -- " one of them said.

The second one whispered, "Well, the teachers are bound to be --"

" -- suspicious soon," the third one finished.

We continued making our way across the room until we sat in our normal seats, which were luckily hidden by shadows once again. Harry was now sitting on the couch with Hermione, and neither of them seemed to take notice of our existence in the room. The tension in the room had grown larger, and I was expecting Ron to come into the common room any moment...

"Five galleons for two of them?" one of the fourth year boys whispered, breaking the silence. They realized that everyone could hear them, so their voices grew so quiet that I could only hear bits and pieces of their conversation.

" -- just ten sickles -- "

" -- not bad -- "

" -- ordered them just yesterday -- "

" -- Filch found someone's Extendable Ears in the hallway outside of Snape's office -- "

" -- must've been Marcus Dently's Ears, he's going to get us all in trouble -- "

Suddenly, the portrait hole opened, and Ron glided into the commom room.

"Hello, Ron," Hermione said, obviously trying to ignore the lipstick smear on his right cheek and the dazed expression on his face. "Er...I have a, um, question to ask..."

My heart was ready to beat out of my ribcage. I couldn't possibly watch Hermione get rejected by the boy that she had a crush on...I heard my heart beat even louder, and I thought about whether or not I even_ had _a heart...I was about to witness a horrible event in Hermione's life...

"WAIT!" I screamed. Even the fourth year boys turned their heads to look at me. I could feel heat crawling up my face.

"Huh?" Ron asked, still with the same look on his face.

"I mean, um..." I hesitated. What was I supposed to do now? Before I opened my mouth, I was saved the portrait hole opening, and two people holding hands, walking into the room. One of them was a fifth year girl with flaming red hair, the other, a sixth year boy with dark hair. They seemed oblivious to everyone in the common room, and the two began snogging one another.

Ron seemed to immediately snap out of his trance. "GINNY!"

The girl, Ginny, pulled herself away from the boy she had been kissing. She glanced over at Ron, then Harry and Hermione. Her face was turning as red as her hair. "Um, hi, everyone," she squeaked. Harry had an expression on his face that I couldn't really define.

"What the bloody hell is wrong with you? You're snogging Dean Thomas right in front of us like a -- " Ron began.

"Who I snog is none of your business, Ronald!"

"I'm going to tell mum and dad about this."

"Fine, go tell them. Like I care."

Ron hesitated, faced the boy named Dean, and said, "If I see you kiss Ginny one more time, I swear, I'll -- "

"Oh, so now you're bringing Dean into this, are you?" Ginny argued. "You shouldn't have been here, anyways. I thought you were off with Lavender, _Won Won_. Aren't you going to the Christmas party with her?"

"So what if I am?" Ron snapped at her. I could see tears forming at the edges of Hermione's eyes. This wasn't good.

"I'm going to bed," Ginny said in a rather harsh tone. She kissed Dean (Ron gripped his wand tightly) and headed upstairs to the girl's dormitories. Dean followed after her, but turned the opposite way at the top of the stairs.

I glanced at Faith, who had been looking at the scene wide-eyed. Then I looked over at Harry and Hermione. He turned his head towards the flames of the fireplace, so I could see his face more clearly. I could define that expression on his face: it was jealousy.

Jealous of who? Dean?

I gasped. No way. He couldn't have liked that girl named Ginny. It didn't make any sense...But still, he looked more upset than he had been before Ginny and Dean began snogging each other right before his eyes. Hermione buried her face in her hands as if she was trying to not make it obvious that she was crying hysterically. Harry looked at her and hesitated, not really knowing exactly what to do.

"Hermione, are you...are you okay?" he asked softly.

"I'm perfectly fine, Harry! Just fine!" Hermione snapped, lifting her face slightly from her hands. Then she kept muttering, "Prat," to herself as Harry glanced around the room. He seemed to be getting more upset by the minute.

"Who are you calling a prat?" Ron asked. Just like Faith and I, Harry and Hermione seemed to have forgotten his existence in the room.

Hermione turned to face him, tears and all. "_You're_ the bloody prat, Ronald! I can't believe that you'd go to the Christmas party with...with..._Lavender_!" She spoke Lavender's name as though it were the most vial word she had ever spoken.

"Well, sorry for liking someone that isn't you, Hermione!" Ron replied. Hermione didn't say anything, so he continued, "I only like you as a friend, okay?"

I closed my eyes and lifted my knees up to my chest. The common room was quieter and more tense than ever. I dared to open my right eye, and I saw that Ron had left, most likely to go to the boy's dormitories. Harry was staring into fireplace, and a shocked expression had overtook his previously jealous one.

"H-Hermione?" he said. I was internally begging him to do something comforting, like patting her on the back, or wiping her tears. But alas, he wouldn't move.

"I...I...he doesn't...I thought that he would at least...PRAT!" Hermione muttered.

Faith yawned and rested her head against the softness of her chair, and I did the same. _Come on, Harry,_ I thought to myself. _Ask her to go to the Christmas party with you..._Nothing was happening, though. And I mean _nothing_. My mind was whirling at the speed of light; surely there must have been something I could do...after all, I was the leader of this entire mission...But mentioning the Christmas party, even matter-of-factly to Faith (at a louder volume than needed), would cause Hermione to burst into tears, and seeing as Harry wasn't really doing anything comforting in the first place, I had to simply sit and wait.

Finally, after what seemed like ages, Hermione ran off to the girl's dormitories, and the fourth year boys that were huddled in a corner had disappeared. So, it was just Harry, Faith, and I, sitting quietly in the common room. My urge to talk to Harry and tell him about Hermione was no longer able to be resisted. I lifted myself off of my chair ("What are you doing?" Faith whispered) and strolled over to the couch that Harry was sitting on.

"Er..." he muttered uncomfortably.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I just got sick and tired of my old seat," I said casually. "Those cushions can only be comfortable for so long." I could see Faith's blue eyes glaring at me warningly within the shadows.

"Um, if you say so," Harry replied, shifting from his position and moving away from me slightly. He continued to stare into the flames. What was so brilliant about the fireplace that made Harry want to stare at it whenever he wasn't saying anything? Was he waiting for someone's face to pop out at him or something?

"Are you going to Slughorn's Christmas party?" I asked. His green eyes grew wide and he moved away from me even further. "Oh, no, I wasn't going to, you know," I said quickly. He made a sigh of relief, and I added, "My brother, Cormac McLaggen, is going. Do you know him?"

Seeming a little annoyed, Harry said, "I know him. And yes, I'm going to the Christmas party."

"Cool," was my reply. "Are you going to the party with your friend?"

"Huh?"

"Your friend. You know, the girl who was crying before," I said, trying to play dumb.

I could see a blush rising to his cheeks, and I resisted to look at Faith's reaction. "Um, no, I'm not going with her," he responded.

"What a shame," I said, shaking my head and looking away from him for a moment. "I would think that she would want someone comforting to go there with her. But, you're a guy, so you wouldn't really get the whole self esteem system in girls."

"Self esteem system?" Harry repeated, and he seemed to be a little more interested in talking with a stupid first year like myself.

"Well, considering that your friend -- "

" -- Hermione."

"Hermione," I corrected myself, "is around sixteen -- "

" -- seventeen. Her birthday is in September."

"Seventeen," I corrected myself again. "She obviously wants a date to go with to the party. When a guy shows up at a party without a date, it's somewhat understandable. But when a girl shows up without a date..." my voice trailed off to add emphasis, and then I continued, "it's just not good. It ruins her self esteem, which completely effects girls' lives." Harry was drawing all this in, but at the same time, he almost looked like he couldn't believe that he was hearing this from a first year. Still, I continued talking. "Hermione probably wants someone that's close to her to go to the party with her, so that she's more comfortable and optimistic about the events of the party."

"And how do you know all this?" Harry asked curiously.

"It's really obvious," I said proudly. "How long have you known Hermione for?"

"Almost six years."

"Perfect!" I squealed. "She would be _very_ comfortable if she went to the party with you --"

"Wait a minute," he interupted. "Hermione is just my friend. Nothing more."

"Then you two can go as friends."

"I'm already going with someone," Harry protested. "Luna Lovegood."

"Who do you think needs you there more?" I asked. "The heartbroken friend that you've known for nearly six years, or the girl who believes in gnargles?" Smiling, I stood up and walked to the girl's dormitory. Faith followed me upstairs quietly, and we left Harry in the common room to think about my last words.

We got changed into our night gowns without saying a word, and then finally, Faith broke the silence.

"I can't believe you just did that."

* * *

**Author's Note: **So...did you like it? I love reviews, so please, if you can, review :) 


	3. Tampered Pumpkin Juice

**Author's Note:** Hey ya'll. Sorry that I haven't updating in such a long time. I got ill, but now I'm getting better, so all's good. Quite honestly, this chapter is probably the worst yet. I'm not gonna lie to you. I almost fell asleep rereading it, and it seems a bit rushed. So please, feel free to completely bash it. Flames are totally accepted (whoah did I just say that?!). Yeah, it said it. I deserve it, anyways. I just felt like I needed to get this chapter out before you all thought I had abandoned it. I also want to make a note that I changed the chronological (however you spell it) order of some events from HBP, so pretty please keep that in mind. Without any further ado, here's the disapointing chapter.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter. The fabulous J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. I'm not J.K. Rowling. Get it? Got it? Good.

**Warning:** This chapter contains a lot of crappiness.

* * *

Delusional First Years: Mission HHr

Objective 3.0: Tampered Pumpkin Juice

Professor Sprout seemed to be extra jolly. It was kind of freaking me out.

"So, children," she said, clapping her hands excitedly, "today, we will be growing mistletoes!"

Okay, so the jolliness was acceptable. "Oh my God," Faith whispered in my ear. Seth rolled his eyes, but we ignored him. "Mistletoe!"

"It's perfect," I said as I perfected the front texture of my robes.

"They will be ready within a week," the professor added. Her toothy smile made me hastily look away and my eyes landed on Seth, who was now muttering something that sounded like, "Please kill me now".

After being told instructions, (Faith and I were listening very carefully -- ten points for Gryffindor) we hastily rushed towards the seeds of mistletoe and prepared to plant them.

"Reggie Yupolitz and Marissa Cavinean!" Georgia Rent whispered to some unknown Hufflepuff across from me. "They will be perfect together!"

I rolled my eyes. Who was stupid enough to put two innocent eleven-year-olds under a mistletoe? It wouldn't be as interesting and Harry and Hermione under a mistletoe. People these days. Pfft.

"Children! Children!" Professor Sprout exclaimed. "Be careful! These mistletoes contain a curse!"

"Ooooooooh," we all said in unison.

"If a mistletoe is hung above two people, and if they don't kiss..." the professor began. She paused for a dramatic effect, and I thought that her eyes were going to pop out of her head any second now. "Then they will be cursed until the two _do_ kiss!"

"But Professor Sprout!" Jennifer Aggley, a fellow Gryffindor interupted. She had curly red hair, and freckles covered the majority of her face. "Doesn't that interfere with free will?"

"Yes, it does, but this is a world of magic, dear. Free will is interfered constantly," Professor Sprout replied.

--------------------

Within a long week, our mistletoes were fully grown, we were allowed to bring them back to our dormitories, and Professor Sprout stopped being the freakishly happy teacher that everyone was afraid to be in the presence of. All was well. Except for the fact that it was the day before the Christmas party, and we (meaning Faith and I...Seth wanted to stay out of the situation) were getting desperate.

"So, what's the plan, Jenny?" Faith asked me in the Gryffindor common room. She had looked up from our Transfiguration homework (a one page essay on a Transfiguration theory made by some random witch named Robin Neplin).

"Dunno," I said quickly. And I wasn't joking. All of this would be much easier if the two were going to Slughorn's Christmas Party together. But unfortunately, that was kind of part of the mission...

Suddenly, Hermione Granger bursted through the portrait hole with a tear-stained face. She began muttering things like, "Prat" and "handlebar mustache". Cormac, my dear older brother, just had to walk in as well.

"Hermione, are you okay?" he asked.

She turned around so quickly that I thought she was going to have whiplash. "Um, yeah, I'm fine," she said plainly, wiping her eyes with her sleeve.

"I was just wondering...er...if you wanted to, you know, go to the Christmas party with me," Cormac said shyly.

What?! No, no, no! This couldn't be happening...I shut my eyes tightly...when I would open my eyes, Harry would replace Cormac... But unfortunately, when my eyes opened, Hermione was smiling at Cormac and saying, "Yes, I'll go with you." She seemed rather happy now, as she rushed up the stairs to the girl's dormitories.

"Cormac Lance McLaggen!" I exclaimed, hopping out of my seat. A few fourth years sitting near the window jumped in surprise. "How dare you? My own flesh and blood, betraying all my precious plans -- "

"What are you talking about?" he asked, backing away from me.

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about. You asked Hermione to the -- the party! You weren't supposed to, because -- " I stopped in my tracks. Of course. Of course! It was perfect. "Never mind," I said hastily. "Just go with her."

"Jenny, I think that you need to go to the Hospital Wing -- are you feeling well?" he asked.

"I'm perfectly fine," I said with a fake smile, and I sat down beside a shocked Faith. Cormac shook his head and stumbled off to the boy's dormitories.

Faith, with wide eyes, said, "Are you _serious_? You're just going to let Cormac go to the party with Hermione?"

I ignored her and said, "My Aunt Delia gave me some Sickness Potion last summer..."

Faith was either having a heart attack or going into a shocked state. I couldn't tell which. "What? What does this have to do with your Aunt Delia? We need to into the party, and first years can't go -- !"

I rolled my eyes. "Faith, we're not going to be first years. Look around. Who do you want to go to the party as?"

--------------------

The next morning, Cormac had mysteriously gotten sick and would not be able to attend the Christmas party. Also, fifth year boy had gotten the same sickness as Cormac. Geez, I wonder who tampered with their morning pumpkin juice.

"Are you sure that Professor Slughorn will let us use Polyjuice Potion?" Faith asked.

"Yes, Faith," I said impatiently.

We walked to Professor Slughorn's office, and Faith had been interogating me all the while. Just when I was about to hex Faith out of aggrivation, Professor Slughorn stepped out of his office and almost walked right into us.

"Oi, 'ello young ladies," he said with a cheery smile. "What can I do for ya?"

"Well, Professor, this is Faith Sparke, and I'm Jenny Mc -- "

"Miss McLaggen, of course!" he said, completely ignoring Faith. He shook my hand, which was ready to fall off from his overuse of force.

"Er...sir, Faith and I were just wondering if we could, um, use a bit of Polyjuice Potion," I said.

"Polyjuice Potion?" he repeated, bemused. "What would two first years like yourselves be doing with Polyjuice Potion?" He raised his right eyebrow quizically.

"My Uncle Tiberius is doing research on it, you know, since he's always been interested in Potions, and I want to be a Potions teacher when I grow up some day, so I thought that taking a look at Polyjuice Potion would help...er...my confidence in succeeding."

Faith gave me a look which told me that she was trying very hard not to burst out laugh. I hadn't even known what I had just said, and I knew it sounded rather stupid. But apparently, Professor Slughorn was falling for it.

"O' course, Miss McLaggen! You're one of my best Potions students. Just like yer Uncle Tiberius..." his voice trails off into mutters of how great my uncle was as the Professor rushed into his office, then returned with a bottle of Polyjuice Potion.

"We actually got Polyjuice Potion!" Faith whispered as we walked to the Great Hall just in time for breakfast. "I can't believe it!"

When we told Seth what we had just managed, he was inarticulate. He just kept staring at us. "So anyways," I said to Faith, ignoring him. "You'll be -- "

"Patrick Hacket, a fifth year Ravenclaw who got invited to Slughorn's party because his great- great- great- grandfather produced the Draught of Living Death," she said robotically. "And he brought along a date, named, um, I can't remember her name..."

"Er...right," I said. "I'll be Cormac, of course. And Seth, do you want to be anyone? We've still got time."

"No, Jenny," he said irritably. "If we get caught -- "

"We won't get caught, Seth, calm down. And even if we do get caught -- which, you know, won't happen -- we'll just get a slap on the wrist, that's all," I replied intelligently.

Seth slammed his fist on the table, causing his pumpkin juice to spill out of his cup. "We could get expelled!"

"How do you know? It's not like you've -- "

"Cedric told me once," he said uncomfortably, sinking back into his seat. My heart dropped.

"Oh," I squeaked. "Okay."

I suddenly felt guilty for questioning Seth. The last time Seth had talked about his deceased cousin was on the Hogwarts express, and he had told me that he wanted to be in Hufflepuff, just like Cedric had. Silence blanketed over the three us of us, while everyone else in the Great Hall talked, laughed, and threw food at each other.

"We'll be careful," Faith assured him.

---------------------

Slughorn's Christmas Party was about to start, and Faith and I had a pretty good idea about what we were going to do. "Are you sure I look okay?" she asked.

"Be quiet, Faith. You're a guy, you shouldn't be caring about how you look for a party," I said as I tapped my foot -- well, technically, Cormac's foot -- on the marble flooring, waiting for Hermione. "And there's your date! Go!" I pushed Faith -- or Patrick Hacket, whatever it was -- towards a giggling fifth year girl.

"Patrick, why did you want me to meet you outside of the Gryffindor tower?" the girl asked as she flipped her hair blonde hair over her shoulder.

"It's, um -- " Faith began with her normal, higher pitched voice. She cleared her throat and said, "It's a shortcut." The girl giggled again, grabbed Faith's arm, and pulled her out of sight. I eagerly checked Cormac's watch. I understood how girls took a long time to get ready, but --

Suddenly, the portrait hole opened, and Hermione Granger stepped out. For the first time I had ever witnessed, she had applied a decent amount of makeup, and her hair wasn't as bushy. She was wearing red dress robes that I envied deeply. "Hi Hermione," I said. "You look...er...nice."

She smiled. "Thank you, Cormac." It felt awkward being called by my brother's name, but I managed to cope with it the entire way down to Slughorn's office. I could hear music, laughter, and loud conversations by the time we entered the familiar corridor which led to the ever-so-family office of Professor Slughorn.

Hermione seemed happy, yet nervous. As we walked into the newly decorated office, she said, "Well, here we go, I guess."

I hear ya loud and clear.

* * *

**Author's Note: **So...that's the chapter that you want to burn. And please, I don't want to hear comments like "how dare you bash your own story! you're cruel and just seeking attention!" Did you guys like the twist where Seth is Cedric Diggory's cousin? It was just a random extra thing that my brain conjured, and I thought that sure, why not, right? It might actually prove to be useful. I've already started working on the next chapter, but that's not saying much because it will probably take a long time to finish. Sorry, dudes. 


	4. Bingo

**Author's Note:** Whoah another chapter. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed. Ya'll are the bomb :) Quickie recap: Jenny and Faith used Polyjuice Potion, so Jenny is Cormac, and Faith is a random fifth year Ravenclaw dude named Patrick Hacket. They were planning on using a mistletoe (enchanted, so that the people under the mistletoe had to kiss or else bad luck would haunt them until they do kiss, blahblahblah) for Harry and Hermione to kiss and possibly fall in love, and all that mushy gushy stuff. If you're really lost, you should probably read the previous chapter or something -- it's not that long. This chapter isn't that long either but yeah.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter, but I do own Jenny, Faith, Patrick Hacket, and Seth (Seth isn't in this chapter, so he doesn't really count. Sorry, Seth)

* * *

Delusional First Years: Mission HHr

Objective 4.0: Bingo

"Harry! HARRY!"

Hermione's scream was too loud for my eardrums. Well, they were _Cormac's_ eardrums, but whatever. They were mine for now. Muahaha. So Harry, who was apparently across the room or something, looked around and searched the crowd until his green eyes found Hermione. The way he smiled at her was kind of cute.

But the way that he was taking in her beautiful appearance was even cuter.

Luna Lovegood, who was talking to Professor Trelawney and whose arm was hooked with Harry's, was pulled across the room as Harry rushed to Hermione. "Wow," he said. "You look...nice."

Hermione blushed, and Harry gave me a wary look. I was apparently smiling or doing something un-Cormac-like, so I quickly changed that by clearing my throat and wiping the stupid smile off of my stupid face. "Thank you, Harry," Hermione said gently. "You don't look so bad yourself."

And she was pretty dang right.

Harry, who was kind of attractive in the first place, appeared to be about a year older in his dressing robes, which were green and brought out the color of his eyes. I shook my head, trying to ignore my feminine side. The music was quieter than I had expected it to be, but the decorations were more elegant than I could have ever imagined. Red and green were blinding my eyes, not only from the decorations, but from everyone's outfits. Luna's yellow dress stuck out like a sore thumb, which didn't really help the blinding thing.

However, my attention was drawn back to Harry and Hermione for moment. They were talking about whatever sixth years talked about, I guess, and I could certainly see the -- what was the word? Cormac used it a lot. Oh, yeah -- _sexual tension_. I smiled to myself, admiring my own maturity that was able to comprehend the phrase.

"Jenny," I heard a stiff whisper from behind me.

"AH! Who's there?!" I exclaimed in my most girlish voice, jumping with fright.

Almost half of the guests at the party turned their heads and stared at me. Cormac was going to kill me once he heard about how "he" had screamed like a girl randomly at a highly populated party. Although the guests returned to whatever they were doing, I could hear them whispering about the previous disturbance. Hermione, however, waved away what I had just done, because she had apparently seen weirder things and was not easily embarassed.

"It's me," the whispering voice said again.

I turned around to see Patrick Hacket. Well, really, he was Faith in disguise, but whatever. The girl that Faith had originally walked to the party with was now lost in a group of giggling girls.

"Thank God she's gone," Faith said with a sigh of relief. "She was about to burst one of her lungs from giggling."

"Too bad that didn't actually happen," I said, becoming annoyed from those giggling girls even from a distance.

"Um, Cormac?" Hermione's soft voice interupted our conversation. She coughed loudly. "I'm going to hang out with Harry for a bit, do you mind?"

I attempted to stop my smile, but I honestly couldn't help myself. "Of course I don't mind!" I said happily. She gave me an awkward glare as Harry led her to another area of the enlarged office.

"Bingo," Faith said.

"Bingo? What the -- "

"It's a Muggle saying for success," she explained impatiently. "Come on, I've got the mistletoe..."

It wasn't until ten minutes and a weird conversation with Professor Slughorn later that we were able to find Harry and Hermione. They were in the least-populated area of the office, talking about a kid named Malfoy.

"I'm telling you, Hermione, he's onto something -- "

"You're getting too skeptical about these things! This is a bloody _Christmas party_! We're supposed to be normal teenagers for once, relaxing and hanging out with our friends," Hermione said, the softness in her voice slightly faded.

Faith gave me a worried glance, but I tried to stay as confident as possible (the sky was the limit when it came to my confidence, after all).

"Are Harry and Hermione even going to bother with a mistletoe above them?" Faith asked. I shrugged to myself, grasped the mistletoe from my pocket, and placed it at the center of my palm. "And are you sure that you've got the charm down?"

"You worry too much," was my reply. "You're gonna die of a heart attack one day, I swear."

"Geez, thanks, Jenny. I love your support," Faith whispered. "And you're gonna die of murder when I get sick and tired of your -- "

I covered her mouth with my hand, which stopped her from talking for a bit until --

"Ouch! What the bloody hell was that for?" I said, trying to keep the volume of my voice the lowest as possible. Faith had bit my hand. I mean, seriously, what kind of civilized witch does that?

"You didn't let me finish my sentence," she whispered. I could see her trying to fight back a smile.

I pointed my wand away from the mistletoe for moment, pointing it threateningly at Patrick Hacket's face, then back at the mistletoe. "_Wingardium leviosa!_"

The mistletoe, with red sparkles gently falling from it before they evaporated into the atmosphere a few centimeters down, levitated into the air without notice from Harry nor Hermione.

"I wish that I could be a normal teenager, too, Harry -- "

"You are!"

"No, I'm not! I've been helping you with everything. Or at least, I've been trying to. You push me away," Hermione said as I concentrated on setting the mistletoe a perfect distance above, yet between, the two sixth years.

Harry was silent for a moment, which meant he was thinking, which meant then that either two things would happen: he was going to say something awkward, yet sweet, or all hell was going to break loose. I closed my eyes once the mistletoe was settled correctly. I could hear Faith quietly applauding me.

"I just don't want you to get hurt," Harry said quietly.

"Harry -- " Hermione began.

Smiling, I kept my eyes closed.

"I mean, there's just so much danger nowadays -- "

"No, Harry, just look up."

My heart was about to explode. Or was it my brain? Or possibly both now, because I opened my eyes and both Harry and Hermione were staring at the mistletoe with reddened cheeks.

"It's enchanted," Hermione said.

"Bingo," I whispered to myself, without even realizing that I was using that stupid word. I knew that she would figure it out. Good ol' Hermione.

"Enchanted?" Harry asked, pulling out a wand and pointing it at the mistletoe.

Hermione laughed, her cheeks still red, as well as Harry's. "No, it's not really dangerous. Well, I mean, it's dangerous if -- if -- "

"If what?"

"It's just bad luck if...if-the-two-people-under-the-mistletoe-don't-kiss," Hermione said.

"Are you just saying that?" Harry asked curiously, examining her expression and lowering the wand in his hand and putting bak it in his pocket.

"No! No, of course I'm not!" Hermione defended. "I've read about these enchanted mistletoes to write an essay for extra credit in Herbology. It's nothing really, just a bit of bad luck if we walk away without kissing."

Liar. It was _something_ really; I could see the hopefullness in her facial expression.

"Right," Harry said, awkwardly clearing his throat. "I don't need more bad luck, though."

Faith squeezed my wrist, trying to contain her excitement. I wished that the two teenagers could just suck it up and kiss, because first years only have so much patience.

"That's true," Hermione agreed. She was waiting for Harry to make the first move.

"So, should we just, like, kiss or something?" Harry asked, awkwardness written all over his voice and the way that he was brushing off invisible debris from his dress robes.

Hermione smiled and hesitantly nodded. And the world almost seemed to stop the moment that the gap between Harry's and Hermione's lips closed. I held back a squeal as Hermione's hands reached the back of Harry's neck and his hands cupped her face and they both deepened the kiss and I couldn't stop smiling to myself with satisfaction.

"What should we do now?" Faith whispered, her smile as wide as mine, as Harry and Hermione continued kissing. I turned on my heel and began walking back to the main scene of the party, and Faith followed behind.

I thought about Harry and Hermione, who were probably still lost in their kiss. I was expecting a little peck or something, but this...this was all a delusional first year could ask for.

* * *

**Author's Note:** This seems like the end, doesn't it? Well, I honestly don't know whether or not I should end this right now, or something. I could add a sequel, like 'Delusional First Years: Mission (enter mission name here)', which is my primary consideration right now. I'm not going to be like those writers like "omg i'll lyk totally end this if i dont get 25 reviews for this chapter". I would, though, appreciate what's written in your reviews: compliments, critique, suggestions, etc., as long as it's not flame. Please review, and please help me decide the fate of the plot :) I will consider all suggestions. Oh, and was my attempt at humor good? I'm kinda in a bad mood, so I would like to know if I made ya smile, like this smiley face :) I'll shut up now.


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